Love Is Blind

Just minutes ago, I receive a call thousand miles away from home. Someone I love called me to just ask how am I coping with myself. I smile, and answered,

With your question, no matter how I felt it has bring me so much warmth. 

I haven't talked to my big 3 for the longest time. Ok, I think I am exaggerating.  I have not talk to my cow for the longest time.I knew she read what I tweeted after her performance during the Grammys. I gotta thank Arakin San for his recent blog post that made her took up the phone and called me. Everything I am going through now doesn't matter any more. I know that I have two cows who are supporting me and holding on me for not letting go this fight. Batman who really knows what in going on in my life and telling me with the sharpest painful honest words. I love you for that. Cornflakes who is always there. Mr D, who see me for who I am and being able to cheer me up in his own ways, and not forgetting my annoying Mr G who always irritates me.

I know at times like this it is never easy but the thing that keeps me going somehow is love. Some may ask do I really have to hold on to something that wouldn't last? I would say if I never try I would never know it will last or not. There ain't anything that is certain besides death. Life is beautiful in its own way isn't it? I guess it is just a little love among let it be family, friends or lovers. Its all the same. Love is something we feel that no words able to describe. I know I am superbly blessed with great friends among my mist. All are angels to me.

And I would be as honest as I could even in writing this post. Someone who is really close to me ask me today that why I chosen a path that there ain't right to her. I just smile and told her love is blind. I am aware of what my choices are when I made that decision months ago. Yes I do miss him once a while. We didn't burn and the best was we still have each other as friends. Honestly at this very moment, that is all I need. Even choosing to love someone that I really dear now which I myself knew what is the path leads to. But I chosen to be honest to my heart. Even though the time wasn't exactly the right time. But what the hell with it. We only have one life to live. I know that I will not able to touch and inspire so many souls in life. But to me is all I wanted is to really change ones life. Just one. And somehow yes I do not deny its hard. I conflict with myself all the time. Knowing my own condition and so on. I felt that I am not deserving at times. But I am trying to change to. No one is perfect in life. But you just need that one person that walks into your life and changed you for good. Many has walked in and out of my life. But it all takes just one soul to change everything. He or she may not be perfect. They don't need to be. But just being themselves and accept us for who we are. I did not found just one. But really a hand full of them. Who don't judge and knowing that we have each others back.

I use to dream of this really passionate love that I always wanted. And yes I had my fair share and I screw up. But somehow it makes me realize in love sometimes is being able to let go. And yes at that moment it is really hard to do so. But all it takes is those who really care and love you just to be there. Many may ask or even say that I am lucky to have people like this in life. I would just smile and say

Give love. If you want love, give it and do not ask for return. It will come to you when time is right. When, only time will tell.

I had waited for ages for all I have at this moment. I got hurt to in the past. With rubbish relationship, those that I screw up, and even that those that slipped pass me in life. I never ever at one moment regret of giving. Because it really came back to me. I am really glad that it had. Even if I would to leave the world at this moment, I will smile and go. Without any thing to regret. I know now that what I am able to do for myself. Many may still disagree with me but I do love myself. And knowing myself better to accept that who I am. And with this it really helps me to give me that strength that makes me wanna go on to give those I love what they needed. Let it be care, acceptance, or love. Once a while we may fall into that realm wanted more from what we have. But we are all humans. We are not perfect.

Love is blind, love is kind, love has no limits. 

I somehow felt I am kinda being infected by someone! Topic and post doesn't really relates at all now. And I am listening to  Kenny Loggins "For The First Time" at the moment. It was shared by a friend. I am like so addicted to his list of music everyday. The song is always beautiful. I think This post I could really relate to that song. You just needed one moment to appear in that persons life and it will just change everything from havoc to a beautiful love. Signing off the night with a big smile on my face.

I love this picture very much. Its just what lovers do when they are in love. Nothing needed to be sane.
It is just love that we have for each other.