Some songs just could easily mess you up. Some song digs in to some memories that you wouldn't wanna talk about. At some point, there are some memories that words don't reach. Even when you try to let others in, you know they would share that burden but just tearing open that scar you try to hide. There's a grace too powerful to name and we push away what we can never understand. We push away the unimaginable.
Some suffering are meant to be shared, but there are some you just couldn't possibly do anything. You just learn to live with the pain every day. You learn to pray, you learn to do things you have never done before. I know there is no replacing what we've lost. Just that the questions that kept repeating in your mind.
If I could spare his life
If I could trade his life for mine
He'd be standing here right now
For a moment there, you feel like you are standing right in the dark alone. There is suffering too terrible to name. I don't pretend to know the pain, I just bury it somewhere unreachable. All I wanna hold you and say "Don't come over." Every birthday, all I can do is remember that you wanted me to live a full life and a happy one. And pushed away all the unimaginable.
Forgiveness... Can you imagine?
I dare not even think to ask for forgiveness. Maybe there is nothing to forgive, but there is still a lot of blame in me. There is just moment that words don't reach. Look around, there are people who just can't reach out. It's just quiet...its just easer to push away the unimaginable.
Sometimes you’ve gotta close your mouth To let the words speak clearly Sometimes you have to close your eyes To let the sun come shining Sometimes you have to learn to leave To make sure love continues Sometimes we’re all gonna need an intermission
Sometimes you’ve gotta get on your knees To keep your spirit standing Sometimes you’ve gotta let it bleed And let go of the bandage Inhale, exhale, release and let yourself receive forgiveness Sometimes we’re all gonna need an intermission
The first autumn wind blew. And the chill that runs down you spine. You know that summer is gone and it is time to endure the cold long nights. No gold could buy that warmth you long for. Auntumn is here.
The stroll in the woods picking up mushrooms and wood. Just wanted to be sure you would provide warm and food. You know you could give anything to see that cute little grind of happiness. For that it seems like summer has never felt when Autumn is here.
Every single cut, ever drop of blood. You know every step would make it worth. Every effort you put, everything you do, it was just for the sake of protecting who matters. The cold doesn't get to you. Your mind remains strong. Nature will never bring me down to my knees. For the things that is worth, you know you are doing it right. You yearn for sunlight, and yet you only have a mere shadow from the gloomy autumn's day. For what is worth, every step takes you nearer to paradise. As auntumn is here.
What I needed stays in the blurred lines. And yet, the wants lingers through when hope is low. As you know, time will tell and heals all. It is temporary until the sun comes out again. I would just need to let go of all the tricks playing in my head. As autumn is here.
You didn't ask yourself why are you doing this. You stop asking how many steps you haven taken. As it is like the sharp thorns from the roses bush. Like the poison ivy that grows strong and keeping out the pest. Just endure the steps, and stop asking question. Winter is merciless and autumn is here.
Sometimes, I too wish to have those juicy mushrooms. But there are times you need to understand what are the things you keep dear to you. For all you know, it just seems that it wasn't that bad having a long hot summers day. You feel free and the breeze that touches your face gives you that little hope. But what is hope when you lost the will. As autumn is here.
St. Regis. : hello, can I speak to Mrs Hah? I am calling from St. Regis Kuala Lumpur.
Dad. : oh sure, hold on.
St. Regis. : hi Mrs Hah. This is R and I am calling from St. Regis Kuala Lumpur. I understand you are planning a surprise birthday celebration for your husband?
Mom. : no.. I don't think so.
St. Regis. : I believe you have booked a stay with us on August 27th?
Mom. : no. I don't think I have. Who are you looking to speak to?
St. Regis. : I would like to speak to Mrs Hah. Wife of Mr Eric Hah.
Mom. : yes this is Mrs Hah speaking but Eric is my son. I believe the person you are looking for is my future son in law who is in Kuala Lumpur at the moment.
St. Regis. : (silent)
Mom. : hello? Are you still on the line?
St Regis. : so sorry. I assume you are Mrs Hah.
Mom. : yes I am and I believe I am the one and only Mrs Hah you are referring to. Eric is my son, and yes you hear it right. The person you are looking for is my future son in law.
St. Regis. : sorry for the confusion. I believe that August would be Eric's birthday? And you son in law is planning surprise birthday party for your son. Is that correct?
Mom. : my son's birthday Is in January. My birthday is in August but I don't think my son is celebrating with me. My son in law's birthday is in August though. Does this mean my son has chosen to celebrate his partner's birthday instead of mine?
St. Regis. : I am sorry Mrs Hah, I believe there is a mixed up I trust your son doesn't have this intention at all.. I am deeply sorry to have confuse all the details.
Mom. : relax girl. I am just pulling your leg. August is my future son in law's birthday. You really got that mixed up. My son is currently in Dubai you can reach him via his email. And way, thank you for making my day, but the future son is law thing I am not kidding. My son has our blessing to love who he wants. I believe you are just not use to an Asian family who thinks and does thing like us no?
St. Regis. : haha. Yes Mrs Hah. You really got me there. I thought you were gonna report me or something as I do not wanna sound like I am a homophobic.
Mom. : it's ok. The world is the way as it is. We just have to accept love comes in all kinds of way. But by the way, you really did screw up the details. Should I tell my son about this?
St. Regis. : errrr.....
Mom. : hahahaha.. I'm joking. Write to my son. He will do what he needs to do with his stay.
Then my mom called me to tell me all of this. I do not know if I wanna cry or laugh. But I know where the lame gene comes from my family.
I guess it is just one of those nights you just can't help wondering about the good and the bad. Time flies and sometimes, I wondered how much things I have missed out because of the circumstances.
I am about to step in my second year being cancer free. Yes it should be a celebratory feat, but somehow behind my head, I can't help wondering if the big C is creating back in my body. It's just a sick feeling in my gut that I can't help to feel.
Me and Leo just made it through 19 months. It has been great for us, but at the back of my mind, somehow I am waiting for the other shoe to drop. Honeymoon period should've ended, but.. Somehow.. It just never stop. Some what unnatural I think..
Life is somehow very smooth and good to me. But why am I having all these bad feeling about it? Of course there are some hard things and small matters we have bumped into but we make it through. Leo has been more than what he is suppose to be. But if I was honest to myself, I can't help to feel somehow is he just too good for me and I am not deserving.
Did my early years fucked me up that bad that I think things wouldn't be this easy? Why am I anticipating all the negative things and harness those bad energy in me? Am I just that fucked up? Or I just think this life now I am living in is unreal?
There is so much going on in my head and all I wanna do is run. I just wanted to get to the airport and fly to you. The first face I see when I get out from the arrival hall is you. Maybe that would ease my worries.. Maybe..
But all I can do now is just pull it through the week before I can see you. All I can do is fantasizing all the little small things I've planned for the whole week. Maybe that is the only thing I am looking forward to without and fears.. But.. Maybe...
Guard it. Look after it. Make sure no one is trying to steal it. Know its worth, understand its value and don’t tell everyone about it. Don’t let people put a discount on it. Don’t let people make you doubt how precious it is. Don’t talk about how you’re scared of losing it or question if it was worth the investment. When you have something good, keep it safe, don’t risk losing it because you didn’t know what to do with it.
When you have something good, love it.
Be kind to it. Look beyond the minor imperfections or minor bruises, don’t try to make it spotless or whole again, love it the way you got it, the way you found it, the way you just couldn’t take your eyes off it when you first saw it and how you kept thinking about it all night. Love it the way you did when all you wanted to do it was get it and what it took for you to get your hands on it. Love it even though at times you will not understand why you bought it or why you wanted it so much. Love it because deep inside it’s what you want but you’re afraid of getting so attached to something you just got. When you have something good, admire it, don’t try to lose it because you think you don’t deserve to have something that good.
When you have something good, understand it.
Understand who owned it before you, which homes did it live in before it found yours and if it was taken good care of or left unattended in a dark room. Understand the history behind it, know the details of how it was made, how it came to life, and what kind of pressure it had to go through to look that good. Delve deeper into the things that make it so special and then try to understand why you are the best person to have it. Why it will be safe in your hands. When you have something good, don’t be scared of how precious it is – precious things find precious homes.
When you have something good, don’t go looking for something better.
When you have the real thing, don’t look at the competition, don’t look at the cheaper fake versions, don’t look at the new models or the different colors and don’t forget why you loved it so much when you’re distracted by all the new things you keep looking at. If you’re always looking for something better you will never appreciate what you have. If you’re always looking for something better, you may not realize that what you have is already the best.
When you score a draft, then you kept it. After a few years, you brought it up, produced it to a track. Every moment in the past is like writing it down in a journal. I remember all the things I thought I wanted it to be. My heart just came to life. Every story has it's thoughts.
Come whatever, I will be the shelter when the rain comes. The pain cuts you deep, but is there a way out? Every single note you score it just doesn't seems like the note it was suppose to be. You are in need of a remedy. I am in need of that remedy to fill up the void.
Sometimes, pain in life is something I cherish. It makes me into who I am today. For some reason, it just pushed away so many things that doesn't matter. The more we try to pleased the world, the more I felt I'm being cornered. I need a keeper. I need a guard. I don't need pretense, I don't need guilt. I just need a way to fill up the void.
Sometimes I feel lonely with the arms of your touch. But I know it was just me letting myself to go places I shouldn't. It ease in the veins, or just call it "a need for my job". The more reasons I look for, the more effective it helps me in my work. But when it is all done and over, the void flows in and I felt I am missing a part of me. I'm being cruel to be kind. I needed the space between me and myself. I do not wanna carry on acting to be fine. I just can't face that void growing inside.
It is the world to me that you are in my life. But I need to survive. To earn my strips, I have to pay to bear my pain. I know I'm not the only one who regrets with what we've done. I miss the air of the rain, that scent is just calming. Sometimes I just thought it's only me, who just didn't become the person who I thought I would've become.
I'm not sure how I can sleep tonight after seeing images like this. How do I go about my "normal" life while so much of the world is in pain? These aren't just children in some war-stricken country... These are OUR children.
I just spent the last hour watching television and live-tweeting from the safety of my warm and comfortable home, while my family next to me. Now I will get to go sleep in my soft bed while these innocent children, who did nothing wrong, are forced to flee their homeland after so much unimaginable pain and loss. Something feels so off.
Why do some of us have privilege?
What makes us special?
What does "us" even mean?
There is no us and them...there is just WE. And not until WE start to see the pain being inflicted on these children all over the world as OUR OWN pain will anything start to change. It's all fine and dandy to have success, to have money, fame and a beautiful life...
There is nothing wrong with it and if you have it there is no need to feel guilty. But we can't forget that with success comes responsibility. A responsibility to actually DO something with it, to stop this seemingly endless cycle of hate, war and even more hate. To find solutions instead of dwelling in the drama of media, negativity, and trending hashtags that without sincerity and action don't change anything.
There are blessings in every trial, every tribulation and every calamity even when it seems impossible to find. We must find the good, the hope, and the love in the rubble of the destruction we are ALL responsible for. We are one family. We are the leaves of one tree. The drops of one ocean.
Today, with a heavy heart I pray for all of humanity, even the terrorists. And for those of us who have been given privilege and open enough eyes to recognize we have it...
I ask you all to start looking for ways to do some good with what you/we have worked so hard for and been given. Because at the end of your life, the good you choose to do on this planet will more than likely be the only thing you can take with you.
It's not what I asked for Sometimes life just slips in through a back door And carves out a person And makes you believe it's all true..
- Sara Bareilles
End of a Chapter 1 - Part 009 : Nov 10th 2015
It's not simple to say, most days I don't recognize myself. It is also not easy to know I am not anything like I used to be. For every reason, I can't believe we are closing chapter one.
The imperfection and the uncommonly interest we had, it is not easy to believe things would actually work out. Now, I've got you and you are not what I've asked for. Bringing back to 365 days of memories we have forged, it's all seems too fast. The good and the bad, we managed to come to a close for this chapter.
Life is always messy, and life has been kind. We are human, and we are bound with our sins. For one reason that I could pull it through is because you have been my anchor. You are mine....
The things we have lost, the things we have made, and the things to come. It is a beautiful disaster. Do I wanna rewrite the ending, I guess I would be happy to just let it be. You're imperfect, but you try. You are messy but you are kind. It is as simple as I can just say that I am the happiest person alive.
It is not easy to know when the part of your dream is becoming reality. There is a thin line where I mixed up what is a fantasy and reality. What is there for me to sabotage everything I have? Where do I wanna go from here? What will the next chapter lies? For the one person who see me for who I am...
Thank you for a wonderful 365 days and I want another 365 years with you.
Dubai Multi Commodities Centre (DMCC) on Tuesday unveiled Burj 2020, a super-tall tower that could even go over 700 metres in height with the top two floors being observation deck.
“The demand that will be registering will dictate the exact height of the tower but at the highest it might go 700 plus. We are looking at a super tall tower and we are looking at having one of the world’s highest viewing decks which will offer 360 degree experience,” Ahmed Bin Sulayem, Executive Chairman, DMCC, said after launching the Burj 2020 District at Cityscape Global.
The pure commercial tower is slated to claim the title of the world’s tallest residential tower in 2020, the year when it will be completed.
“We have seen lot of success and lot of mistakes as well but we are not going to repeat it in this initiative,” Bin Sulayem said.
The master planned Burj2020 District will comprise seven towers and over one million square metres built up area (BUA), which is equivalent size of approximately one-third of the existing Jumeirah Lakes Towers (housing 66 towers) and nearly twice the size of New York’s Rockefeller Center. In addition, there will be retail offering totaling over 100,000 square metres.
The district has been designed by Adrian Smith and Gordon Gill (AS+GG).
“Inspired by faceted gemstones, the Burj2020’s design is rooted in the principles of perpetual value, enduring strength and everlasting beauty. Symbolising the next stage of growth for the city, the design of the tower is also inspired by the facets of a diamond – elegant, bold and timeless,” said Smith.
Meydan, a Dubai-based developer, has also announced plans for the world’s highest 360° observation deck at 655 metres, while other developers have announced plans to build the second tallest tower in the emirate after Burj Khalifa, the world’s tallest tower.
Malindo Air has filed a number of operational schedule for proposed new routes it intends to launch, based on latest update in Sabre GDS timetable listing. Based on the listing, the airline intends to launch following service from 11NOV15.
Kuala Lumpur – Hong Kong OD605 KUL1015 – 1410HKG 738 D OD606 HKG1510 – 1905KUL 738 D
Kuala Lumpur – Perth OD151 KUL0825 – 1410PER 739 D OD152 PER1500 – 2055KUL 739 D
Reservations for these service are currently not available, further changes to planned launch dates remain highly possible.
Elsewhere, Malindo from 25OCT15 plans to adjust operations on following routes: Kuala Lumpur – Delhi eff 10OCT15 Increase from 7 to 10 weekly Kuala Lumpur – Denpasar Increase from 1 to 2 daily Kuala Lumpur – Dhaka Reduce from 2 to 1 daily Kuala Lumpur – Jakarta Increase from 1 to 2 daily Kuala Lumpur – Kathmandu eff 01OCT15 Increase from 3 to 7 weekly.
The winners of the region’s most prestigious travel awards were announced today at an exclusive presentation luncheon at the Conrad Hong Kong Hotel.
The Business Traveller Asia-Pacific Awards is now in its 24th year and still growing, with the addition of two new categories for 2015: Best Hotel Loyalty Progamme; and Best Luxury Hotel Brand in Asia-Pacific.
One of the reasons why the awards are so revered, and so popular, is that they are chosen by people who travel for a living, frequently using airports, airlines and hotel services, and visiting regional destinations. These people are the readers of and subscribers to Business Traveller Asia-Pacific. A good proportion of them travel particularly frequently, racking up tons of miles along the way!
This year a number of brands have held their award winning positions from 2014, reflecting their popularity and pursuit of excellence. But there were some significant new winners, particular among the hotels, perhaps reflecting the growth in new properties springing up in the region.
Perhaps not surprisingly, Singapore Airlines again reigned supreme, winning the overall award for Best Airline in the world and for Best Asia-Pacific Airline for the 15th year running. The airline also managed to scoop the awards for: Best Airline First Class; Best Airline Business Class; Best Airline Economy Class; and Best In-flight Catering.
Lufthansa won the award for Best European Airline, while awards for Best North American Airline, Best Middle Eastern/African Airline and Best China Airlinewere won by United Airlines, Qatar Airways and Air China, respectively. All four airlines also won the same awards last year. British Airways won the Best Premium Economy Class award.
Cathay Pacific also enjoyed some prestige at the event, winning the Best Frequent Flyer Programme award, and also the Best Airline Lounge in Asia-Pacific.
The Grand Hyatt won the award for Best Business Hotel Brand in the World, marking its third consecutive year in the top spot, while the Shangri-La won the award for Best Business Hotel Brand in Asia-Pacific.
Island Shangri-La Hong Kong and The Peninsula Hong Kong won Best Business Hotel in the World and Best Business Hotel in Asia-Pacific, respectively. The Fullerton Bay Hotel Singapore won the Best Boutique Hotel in Asia-Pacific for the second year running, while The Westin Singapore won theBest New Business Hotel in Asia-Pacific.
Mandarin Oriental took out the inaugural award for Best Luxury Hotel Brand in Asia-Pacific, while the new award for Best Hotel Loyalty Programme was won byStarwood Preferred Guest.
In the awards for serviced residences, Ascott remain undefeated in the category ofBest Serviced Residence Brand in Asia-Pacific since 2004, when the award was introduced. Fraser Suites Top Glory Shanghai won the award for Best Serviced Residence in Asia-Pacific.
For work and play destinations, Hong Kong and Bangkok once again won awards for Best Business City in the World and Best Leisure Destination in Asia-Pacific, respectively.
Live to love and love to live. The motto that I held on my entire life. Just a regular guy who loves what I am passionate in life. A song writer and producer. Living life on the move. From Malaysia to The States, New Zealand to Singapore. With the companion of great people in life. In and out from the music industry. Taking everything one step at a time.