39 Hours

Wondering that one day if I have gone missing, I bet my family would know within the next 24hours. Thanks to the concern of a few good friends of mine. I really appreciate the effort and care you have shown. But in course of why I was missing, I was deep asleep and I am really sorry about that. I couldn't help that either. With what were the reasons I went into deep sleep I shall not elaborate here.

Thinking back a year ago. Things would be different. I was kinda isolating myself from the outside world. But I am glad I took the courage to walk out from it. Certainly, I know those who really care went into hell. Especially Batman, Cow and Mr D. The 3 of you really were amazing people to have in life, I am really sorry I have put all of you into darkness for the past 39hours. But on the other hand, I wanna thank Ms Cow very much for arranging all my accommodation  and programs on the 14th. It is something I can't find words to thank you so much for doing all for me. It will be my best birthday ever. Batman, thanks for being by me all the time with your busy schedule. Mr D, I am sorry to put you in the dark and in so much worry. I am back now. But what you wrote was amazingly warm. I initially wanted to share what you wrote but on the other hand, I would keep that for my own private viewing only. But thank you so much for everything.

What really got me into thinking was what would happen if I were to continue isolating myself? What if I was not to be awake? It really got me into so much fear. But I honestly do not know besides using words to thank all these beautiful souls. I know I can count on you, You never deserted me when I really needed most.

On the other side of the world, I am filled with anticipation to get back and dealing with everything I had in mind this year. But on the other hand, a heavy heart to leave somewhere I really could call home. Anyway, it is not permanent. I will be back before anyone of you could say "Bitch".

How am I if others wanna know? Awesome! Yes a slight sting once a while but I am feeling great. A week has past and I would say 2012 has been very kind to me. With a slight minor emotional hiccups. But all is well.

The only thing I guess was acceptance. To accept the fact that a special someone who use to be wasn't the one to be. It's not like I have not move on or so. Just sometimes whenever there are updates on you, a little sting sensation going on. Should I remove you from my tweet? My answer is why do I need to? The fact is you have already move on and I am coping it well. Let memories flow once a while would be nice. Even the sensation wasn't good at first. But the funny thing was we both almost tweeted at always the same time. Sometimes knowingly that it has been so long, why should I be feeling anything any more? Why should I even care any more? My answer would be why should I not care any more? Anyway, we once loved each other. And it was my choice to give it up at the first place. But honestly, happy news updates on you really do bring relief in me. It was just too bad it wasn't me now. So, Ricky, SUCK IT UP!!!

I am now really anticipating for my champagne and fondue. Thanking those who made it happen for me. I know that deciding on celebrating my birthday would be one very good decision I have made. Having to say so, I also wanted to openly announce that for my trip back this time round, I wanna invite anyone to join me and my close friend, Cornflakes and Garend to make an event happen. We will be having visits to the homeless, paediatrics cancer patient, and the red ribbon association. We wanted to bring love and joy to them in Malaysia. A give back for a wonderful year we had last year.

Anyone who is interested to join us or even to donate to this event, please do contact us at

facebook.com/StJamesFoundation

We would like to see everyone there. With good will and love,

Ricky.