Letter to James

Baby~ I know I m not in any position to say anything.
I regretted everything that I have done. I regretted putting you in so much pain. All the pain I am facing now is all i deserved.
Somehow I really wish for forgiveness.

I do not know what else I can do. I have been refreshing you page again and again every moment just wish for some news to you.
I will take this as my punishment. And now, I really feel how you felt when Nic left you. And for the first time truely, I am sorry for that too.

Baby, I am really begging you. Dun stop everything here. please give me a second chance to love you back. I know now nothing will change anything. But please don't give up just yet. I still love you very much and I really do not know how am I going to go everyday ahead. I know you will not let me near you now. You will not let me in your life at this point in life. I am not requesting anything. I just can't see myself stop loving you.

I really have nothing when I dun have you. But what keeps me moving everyday is jus knowing how much you love me. Maybe this will take months or even years or even a life time. I will be where I am. When you are able to forgive me and love me back again. I just want you to know where I will be waiting.

Please do not reply and you need not say anything. I know how much stress you are in now with everything in hand. But all I want you to know is I am not giving you up and I think its time for me to step up in your position to make things right. I will do my part without wanting you to do anything.

Baby, I am really sorry how you have been for these past few weeks but I am changing to be the better. At least to be a better person in life. And nothing will change my love towards you. I love you very much. And I know this is the way I am heading. I really can't be in that way not loving you and giving up everything just like this. I am not perfect. I made mistakes and I am willing to change.

Until there isn't anymore in life, that is the time I will totally let go.
I love you very much and I am sorry for all my wrong doings. I only have the necklace you left in my wallet. that is the only thing I have that I can feel I am close to you. Baby.. I really meant everything I say this time. I am paying my dues now.. All I am asking is please give me a second shot for our future that we have dreamed of.

You are still my everything. Even your friends now may not approve of me but nothing can stop me to continue loving you.
I really do baby~ Take good care of yourself. Last time in this mail. I love you very much~