Dealing with Drugs issue~

Sometimes somehow I wish everything was just a dream~
Have you ever heard that by the usage of drugs makes you look healthy?
God, I really won't believe any of this till I see it myself.
But in the course~ I saw one~ on my very own self~

I sometimes wonder is it my history of drugs usage?
Or is it that when after you are able to control Heroin you are able to control any kinda substances?
I dunno~ The fact is, I start to put on weight after having my depression,
I start to able to sleep~ I start to even lead a normal life like many others.
The only differences is I am using substance.

But I wonder sometimes. Why still there are so many that can't even control themselves using it?
Since September 5th 2010. I became a daily user~ I use up to 0.5mlg a day sometimes.
But yet, nothing affected my job~ Nothing affected my personal life.
But the fact was I am able to even jus stop using for weeks anytime I wanted.
And i dun even have any withdrawal symptoms~

Am I really that fucked up?
Maybe I am~ But only God will know~
I am just trying to ease the pain in my family as I really dun want them to worry bout me anymore~

Get It Right

This is something really beautiful~
I wanted to blog about this as it really reflects beautifully at parts and bits of my life~
This song is really beautiful~ I really wish somewhere somehow someone also will feel the exact same thing as I do~

What have I done?
I wish I could run
away from this ship going under.

Just trying to help
out everyone else
now I feel the weight of the world is
on my shoulders.

What can you do when your good isn't good enough
and all that you touch tumbles down?
Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things
I just want to fix it somehow
But how many times will it take?
How many times will it take for me to get it right?
To get it right...

Can I start again?
With my faith shaken
Cause I can't go back and undo this

I just have to stay
And face my mistakes
But if I get stronger and wiser
I'll get through this

What can you do when your good isn't good enough
And all that you touch tumbles down?
Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things
I just want to fix it somehow.
But how many times will it take?
How many times will it take for me to get it right?

So I throw up my fist
Throw a punch in the air
And accept the truth that sometimes life isn't fair
Yeah, I'll send out a wish
Yeah, I'll send up a prayer
And finally, someone will see how much I care

What can you do when your good isn't good enough?
And all that you touch tumbles down.
Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things
Just want to fix it somehow
But how many times will it take?
How many times will it take
to get it right?
To get it right.