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Tuesday, July 6, 2010

I hurt the person I love and I hurt myself

it has been a while since I was here.
In many ways, I really thought that I would never come back here and pour everything out.
But for now, i have no where to go.

Because of my insecurities, my fears. I have destroyed the love of my life.
I hurt the person who I love the most in the world.
Having all the guilt here. I am wondering is there anything I could turn back time.
You have love me with your all. And yet now I am thinking, what was I really fearing of?
What was all the insecurities about?

I know human made mistakes. But at this point,
the regret that I am holding will sooner or later kill me.
You walk me out of my pain, you walk me out of my health,
and now, I made you walk out of my life.

I regret every step that I have taken.
I have no say at all to ask you to stay.
But all I can do this time to be true to myself,
is just keep on loving you.
I will be where I am waiting for you.
Even it takes a life time. Even I know you will never come.

This lyrics below really reflects how I really feel now~
I am going through a very tough period of time,
But with this I know what will be my will to live on.
What is the purpose I have in life.

Baby, I will keep on loving.

If No One Will Listen

Maybe no one told you there is strength in your tears
And so you fight to keep from pouring out
But what if you unlock the gate that keeps your secret soul
Do you think that there's enough you might drown

If No One Will Listen, if you decide to speak
If no one is left standing after the bombs explode
If no one wants to look at you for what you really are
I will be here still

No one can take you where you alone must go
There's no telling what you will find there
And God, I know the fear that eats away at your bones
It's screaming every step, "just stay here"

If you find your fists are raw and red
From beating yourself down
If your legs have given out under the weight
If you find you've been settling for a world of gray
So you wouldn't have to face down your own hate

If no one will listen, if you decide to speak
If no one is left standing after the bombs explode
If no one wants to look at you for what you really are
I will be here still

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