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Sunday, April 14, 2013

A Slice Of Reality

From a child is born, to growing up. By the journey of finding oneself, to be the person we wanted to be. To fall in love, and fall out of love. And settling down to the inevitable death is welcome with open arms. The vulnerability of life, every step is taken counts. When I called home today, my dad told me that one of my sons, Geneboy's tongue literally fell off.

The reason to me isn't really my main concern right now. All I feel right now is a heavy heart. I don't know what I could do. He isn't in pain any more but just the idea of him not having a tongue now just literally killed me. Just have no idea or how could I make it better for him. I am worried, but I know nothing I can do for him right now.

For many reasons, this kinda hit me. A parent's heart. Maybe some of you might think I am a little over reacting towards a dog. But to me, he isn't just a dog. The memory of me bringing him home the first time. Having to bath him for the first time. Powdering him and feeding him. I think I finally know how a parent will feel when their son is in pain.

I know everything happen for a reason. But I really don't wish that this is it. And I now understood why I am holding on till this very day. Every will to keep striving on to live, it isn't just for me. They might not show, but  that unspeakable pain is constantly reminding them every part of it. As I am typing this, that sting in my heart for my son who is just waving his tail at me might not even be there when I am there.

I think that final piece of me that I was looking for in my new score is finally found. What simplicity life and that perfect sting of it. And for a parent to loose their child is just something against the natural way of life. That innocents and ideal way of life will just be robbed without any warning. It is just how reality is. No one will ever be ready to lose something or someone they dear in the heart. For every reason there is in this world, it will always be an excuse.


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