Whenever Hearts and Never Goodbye is being sang and played, I am just trying to hold myself together. This two songs meant so much to me. I never have thought that this would be shared to the world. I held myself and say, stand strong Ricky, It will be alright.
Listening now to Pierre est heureux: The Final Journey / Home. It was a moment there like how Hearts and Never Goodbye unfolds. Being able to find myself going through phases of life as it is. Having great friends who were always there. Having a god brother who has shown me so much in life. Thanks to my big 3, Jeff, and all the great souls standing with me all these while. I were to say that in the end, it will be a great journey.
I know that many times, it has been tough to hold myself together. But with all the support and understanding angels around me, things slowly became really beautiful. One by one, and I am touched to have been though life with all of you. The tremendous support and love. I realize I haven't been blogging for some time now. And to my readers, thanks for all the mails. I know all of you are ever supportive.
Tonight was really a great night. Your memories drowned me whenever I listen to these songs. I honestly thankful to have you in life. Taught me so much about courage, and how life can be even more beautiful. Even that our path may not cross over again, but with everything we had, it makes me better and grateful. I do not know how things may be or I would ever see you again after this, but we had our time. It was the most beautiful moment in my life.
Thinking about Mr D and Shinigami. You both really are great souls that changed me for life. Thankful for helping me quitting drugs, thankful for getting me on my feet again. And thankful for the love you both shared. I am so proud of both of you. Both in your own beautiful way. I miss both of you as much. At times like this, you both always are the greatest thing that ever happen to me. Ever being there for me, being proud of me, being loved.
Cornflakes, you were the only person that always think of ways to get me to smile. I assure you one day soon. I will. You made me wanna keep on standing even at times, I just wish all would just end. Mr G, the angel I could always count on. You always come and go. But at the right time. I am really grateful to have you in my life. When every one were just hearing me, you listened. And you were always there to get me right. I know now at this point, thinking of all of you, it makes me feel I was never alone. I know that things will get back to where it was. From the very beginning in the end. I know that I misses you guys very much.
I can't wait to see my cow really soon. I hope you would be able to come and be proud of what you have been pushing me to do. And the most important person I wanna thank is Nell. I know that many times, things were not going the way you wanted, but all I feel is grateful for everything you have given me. I am thankful and grateful for all that it is.
As time ticking on, the only thing left in my mind is family. I know I haven't spend much time with you this year but soon, I will be making up all the time. I know that you guys will be having tougher time in the near future coping with me. But I know the love you both can give is everlasting. Mommy, even though sometimes I may say something hurtful about how life is such a bitch but I don't mean it. Even that things are tough for me, but the life you have given me more than anything I could ask. Things are beautiful whenever you open your mouth. You were ever supporting me and you were always there for everything I am going through. The hardest thing is always seeing you seeing me in pain. I know you will be there with me these remaining time this year. There are no words to describe on the love you have given. Everything just made sense when I think of what we have in life together as a family. A love that is so unconditional. Feeling mellow relatively tonight. But knowing you will be with me is the only thing I would ever ask for.
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