Away From Reality?

"Tell me all your secrets
Tell me your fears
I won’t push you away
I’ll only pull you near
No, I won’t judge you
I’mma help you through."

- Sia Fuller

Frustration  - Part 005 : February 26th 2015

There are so many things going on lately I just got no idea where should I even start. There are so many things that put me in a position to actually think about what are the things that is for me. Or should I say for us.

At times, I see life in a way it is so precious. Living with cancer is one thing that force you to actually see things the way it is. No short cuts, no running away. And saying that, I wanna surround myself with the positive people around me. I see from time to time, there will be some people that walked into my life, and right there and then, I just cut them off. One thing I realize, life is too short to even waste my life on those that doesn't cherish what they have. Yes, I do not deny that it really irritates me.

I am living with cancer, a handful or people I love and care for are suffering from terminal illness or even some living with an incurable condition. I was an addict. No.. I should say, I am an addict. I am 17 months clean now, but the crave will always be there. It is something worst than living with cancer. I have to admit that even I don't want to. The question is, there are so many of us are trying to live the right way, not running away and face our demons.

So, the question is, how would you feel when you are trying to do things right, and you see those around you that keeps throwing everything away? Yes I wouldn't deny that everyone yearns for something. But how does it gives a person to throw away a temple of good health when they just felt about their life doesn't go the way they wanted.

I have so much I wanted to write down right here. But I am not going to. Life is one thing I find it beautiful when you know what is the definition of life. You will never have what you wanted, but you will be given what you can handle. All you gotta do is be patient. I waited for a whole 4 years. And I found my anchor.

I am signing off for now heading off to China for a short alone trip. Time to clear my mind and recharge. And here is one thing I wanna share with all of y'all.. And to the special one : " A lot a lot, and muscle. Everyday and every minute... " :)

But piece by piece you collected me
Up off the ground but you abandoned things
And piece by piece you filled the holes that you burned in me
At six years old and no
He never walks away
He never asks for money
He takes care of me
He loves me
Piece by piece
He restored my faith
That a man can be kind
And a father could stay

First KLM B787-9 Destinations Revealed

KLM will operate its first B787-9 aircraft to Bahrain, Cairo and Xiamen later this year.

The Dutch carrier will roster the Dreamliner onto its Amsterdam-Abu Dhabi-Bahrain route on October 25.

From November 30, the aircraft will fly two of KLM's four weekly Amsterdam-Cairo services, and from December 2 it will fly two of its seven weekly Amsterdam-Quito-Guayaquil-Amsterdam services, on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

Lastly, on December 3, KLM will deploy the B787-9 on its twice-weekly Amsterdam-Xiamen route.

On all services, the stretched Dreamliner will replace B777-200ER aircraft, reports airlineroute.net.

Air France-KLM has 25 Boeing 787-9 Dreamliners on order. The group has yet to take delivery of the aircraft.


klm.com

LAN ReceivesFirst B787-9 Dreamliner

LAN Airlines has taken delivery of its first B787-9 Dreamliner.

The carrier said it will roster the aircraft onto South American routes in April.

The delivery makes LAN the first Latin American airline to operate both the B787-8 and B787-9 Dreamliner variants.

The LATAM group now has 11 787s in its fleet. It has a further 21 on order, including ten B787-9s.

LATAM is leasing the new B787-9 from Amsterdam-based lessor AerCap.

LAN and affiliate carrier TAM Airlines last year revealed their new unified cabin design.

lan.com

American To Fly B787-8 to Beijing and Buenos Aires

American Airlines has announced the first routes its new B787-8 Dreamliner will operate.

The US carrier, which took delivery of the aircraft last month, will first fly the B787-8 between Dallas/Fort Worth and Chicago O'Hare from May 7. The route was announced in January as a B777-200ER service.

The Dreamliner will then be launched internationally between Dallas/Fort Worth and Beijing Capital International on June 2.

Business cabin

Business seat

From June 4, American will deploy the B787-8 from Dallas/Fort Worth to Buenos Aires' Ministro Pistarini International airport.

The airline said it will announce further Dreamliner destinations for 2015 in due course, as it takes delivery of more aircraft. It has ordered 42 B787-8s and B787-9s, with the option for a further 58.

Andrew Nocella, American's chief marketing officer, said: "Adding the 787 Dreamliner to our network gives us the opportunity to increase our efficiency on long-haul flights across the globe and potentially open up new markets in our network."

American's B787-8 is configured in two classes, with 28 fully-flat seats arranged 1-2-1 in business, 48 Main Cabin Extra (economy with an additional six inches of legroom) seats arranged 3-3-3, and 150 Main Cabin seats, also laid-out 3-3-3.

Main Cabin (economy)

Economy seating

American is currently in the process of a $2 billion improvements programme. This will see the introduction of upgrades including fully-flat seats on international long-haul aircraft; international wifi; a new design for Admirals Club lounges wordlwide.

The airline is also retrofitting its entire fleet of B777-200 aircraft and selected B767-300s, B757-200s and A319s.

aa.com

Regal Opens Second Airport Hotel

The 297-room Regal Airport Hotel Xian joins the brand's Regal Airport Hotel Hong Kong.

The new property, which had a soft opening at the end of 2014, is the only hotel to be connected to Xian Xianyang International airport via a covered "link bridge" that leads to Terminal 3.

Superior room

Room categories range from Superior and Deluxe, both of which are 40 sqm, to 25 indulgent suites, including a 428 sqm Presidential Suite.

Facilities include six restautants, three ballrooms, including the 720 sqm Grand Ballroom that can accommodate 1,200 people, 20 meeting rooms, Executive Club lounges, a spa, fitness centre and indoor swimming pool.

Belinda Yeung, executive director and COO of Regal Hotels International, said: "These are exciting times for Regal as we look to expand our portfolio from this, our 14th opening, to a multi-brand portfolio of 24 properties by 2016, and I am delighted to be able to welcome guests to our second airport hotel.

"Judging by the incredible feedback we have already received since the property enjoyed its soft opening at the end of last year we fully expect it to follow in the footsteps of our multi-award winning Regal Airport Hotel in Hong Kong."

Vietnam Airlines Reveals A350 and B787-9 Cabins

Vietnam Airlines has unveiled the new seat products that will be available on its soon-to-be delivered A350 XWB and B787-9 aircraft.

Airbus A350 XWB

The A350 business class product will feature the Sogerma Solstys seat by EADS. Those who have flown with Iberia, Emirates or Etihad will be familiar with the design.

A350 XWB business class

Boeing B787-9

B787-9 business class

The cabin will be arranged in a 1-2-1 configuration, meaning all seats provide direct access to the aisle. Dimensions for the seats have not yet been revealed.

Meanwhile, the airline has decided to go for a completely different seat design on its B787-9, with the Dreamliner instead featuring the Zodiac Cirrus seat – commonly seen on Cathay Pacific and American Airlines aircraft.

With a total of 28 seats, Vietnam Airlines has configured it B787-9 business cabin with a 1-2-1 layout. Each seat will come with a 42-inch pitch, and a 15.4-inch IFE screen.

Both the Sogerma Solstys (A350) and Cirrus (B787) seat can be reclined into a fully-flat bed.

Premium economy

Economy class

Vietnam Airlines also has a premium economy cabin, which the company brands as Deluxe Economy. Details about the A350 XWB's version have not been released, but design-wise, it is expected to be identical to that on the B787-9.

The Dreamliner will offer 35 seats in Deluxe Economy sporting a 2-3-2 layout. Along with a 42-inch seat pitch, the product will offer a 10.6-inch IFE screen.

Finally, economy seats on both aircraft have been arranged in a 3-3-3 layout. Personal televisions are available on all seats in coach.

Last month, it emerged that Vietnam Airlines will move its London-bound services from Gatwick to Heathrow this summer.

Fear & Life

“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.”

- John Lennon

Fear - Part 006 : February 4th 2015



There are times when things are just spinning out of our control. There are so many things that we can think of avoiding these but fact is, it will never be in our grasp. Sometimes, it doesn't have to be a bad thing. I know a fact that whenever I am around him, I could totally forget that I am living with cancer. To a certain point, it is a good thing for me. I feel like I am living. But sometimes, I asked myself who am I fooling? Even if I felt that way, fact is, there will never be anything normal to begin with. Maybe this is the part that I love. He never see me as a sick person. I feel like I am living a life that is what meant to be lived. 

I won't deny from time to time, the burden I am carrying is heavy. I know I don't have to. But to a certain extend, it will always be. They say when you lose everything, let it be physical attachment, emotional attachments, or even monetary aspect of things. I think that I am now at a point where I know whatever I am doing, I can't fail in doing it. I think it's a healthy part of our relationship. We k now where we wanna be, and where we are heading towards. But sometimes, I just wanted the end result so bad, I just beat myself up inside. I can't get over the part where time is what I don't have. 

I do not know what is next, but I know where I wanna be next. I think there is a part of me that kept wanting to runaway from reality, that we are now having so many vacations. To a point where I know when I am having my time with him, I could lie to myself that I am just as normal as everyone else. But now lies the question of how long more could I run away from? I am now at a point I need to face my demons. Yes, I do fear. I fear that everything will change. I fear that I couldn't be the person I wanted to be. A relapse after another is torture. But what can I do about it? It's been so long I've been living like this. Even though the game has change, one thing that will not change is the fear. It isn't the fear of the end, but the fear of what will things be if things goes the wrong way? 

One thing I could agree with a common saying, 

You got nothing else to lose when you don't have anything else to lose. 

It is true, but that doesn't apply when you are with someone else. You feel you got everything to lose. Today marked the third month since we fell in love with each other. Time flies, but there wasn't a day went by that I do not fear of losing everything. And yes, I will not deny now that I have everything to lose. It isn't about what physical or even monetary lost, but what you hold dear to your heart. Now I fear that I might lose the battle against cancer one day. What will happen if I do? 

There are so much more in life that what we hope for. But I am questioning if that hope is enough? Love drives you, but life, well.. Sometimes, life is just being a bitch. I am lost in a way. There are things that I wanted to make right where I know I couldn't just push the speed of it. I read about case studies that now medical studies had successfully deactivate the HIV virus. Of course these are great news to me as there are a few that I hold close to my heart are living with it. But everyday, I looked up on my google alert, there is near to zero on a thing for a cure to cancer. Put aside the terminal patience, for those who are living with it, I know it was never easy. But why... Is it too much to hope? 

I know I'm spiraling, but how would I able to stop? How would I even could for a minute just wished that it has a hope for living without it? The future made a lot of sense to me right now after having you in my life. But how could I achieve it? I need a way. I need hope.  I needed something to hold on to. I need that future. 

I need the fear to just let me go..