Ashes And Wine

Don't know what to do anymore
I've lost the only love worth fighting for
And I'll drown in my tears, don't they see?
And that would show you, that would make you hurt like me

All the same
I don't want mudslinging games
It's just a shame
To let you walk away

Don't know if our fate's already sealed
This day's a spinning surface on a wheel
And I'm ill with the thought of your kiss
Coffee-laced, intoxicating on her lips

Shut it out
I've got no claim on you now
Not allowed
To wear your freedom down, no

And I'll tear myself away
That is what you need
There is nothing left to say

But is there a chance, a fragment of light
At the end of the tunnel, a reason to fight?
Is there a chance you may change your mind
Or are we ashes and wine?
The day's still ashes and wine
Or are we ashes?




At first, I wasn't sure what was meant by "ashes and wine". I read all the posts on a site, and could see most of everyone's interpretations, but none seemed to be quite right. Then it hit me: I think both ashes and wine are both things that are used up. An ash used to be a log, cigarette, etc. Wine used to be a grape. Both of them have lost their ability to ever change or be anything different than simply ashes and wine. The entire song is about whether there is hope or whether fate has already spoken. If they were cigarettes and grapes... they'd still have a chance; if they are ashes and wine, they are done.

And when I loop this song again and again, reality slowly flows in. In life, we are always just ashes and wine. Somehow, we feel that sometimes in this cruel reality. Even yes that most of my days are spent on this bed now, but yes, I felt that sometimes. I know that fact couldn't change. Reality will always be reality. We are always at the turning point to give in or to hold on. Till this very moment, I still choose to hold on. I knew that  if I don't, who will it ever be there to hold you when you needed? I miss you like hell at this very moment. I dreamed of everything I could share with you in life. But I have no idea how now. It seems impossible. What should I do? How should I go from here?