Breathe Again

This one song that I have been looping for days now. A little nostalgic but yet, it's a part of me that made me grew up. The first few lyrics remind me of looking back at the one I loved and was left behind. It was one love that push me over the edge, to love and to hate, and finally, accepting the truth that what I did was wrong. It's a beautiful past. Just wanted to share this bit with the world. 

"Car is parked, bags are packed but what kind of heart doesn't look back? To the comfortable glow of the porch the one I will still call yours" 

It reminds me of no matter how much I convinced myself that person wasn't meant to be a part of my life, I had to look back and I thought of him as having a very soothing presence. This song to me speaks of one who loved another so much that he defined breathing as being with him. He is leaving him but not because he doesn't love him, it's because in his heart he knows he'll never truly love him back. And that they aren't right for each other. 

It still doesn't stop him from thinking of the other as the air he once peacefully breathed in. 

"The love he holds in his hands" 

Is actually the love he has for him, he's given the other person his heart. 

"My burden is a love I can't carry anymore" 

Tell us how badly he wants to hold onto that piece of the other he still has, those memories but loving him is so painful, remembering him hurts so much that he must steel himself to forget. Even trying to let go who is so precious to him is a burden, like loving the other was also a burden. As he looks back all those words he told himself to move on come undone and his resolve is weak. 

He questions if the fire still burns. But he knows moving on is the only right thing to do so. He knows and understands the other so well that he is a reflection of all he is and all he had- Being with him so much has also made him who he is. And he thinks he would kill to go back to the time when he could be with him. 

Loving him until reality came along and made him realize his fate is to move on. He moves on with a heavy heart but always remembers and compares every joy in his life with the joy of knowing him and loving him. 

He tries to forget about him but in the back of his head he is the truest happiness she has ever known. He prays therefore, and his prayer is a form of giving up,- that even though he can't be with him, there must be a hope of them belonging together again someday. That someday he will love him back.

Someday he would be able to laugh in his company again. Someday he might find happiness again even of it means truly forgetting him. And that- that someday, he'll breathe again.